So the one thing I take from my counselling session today …..writing with a pen is more in tune with your subconscious than typing. This would explain why I find it easier to write via my blog typing than writing in my journal with a pen. So maybe ‘operation treetop murders’ needs to be explored further via pen and paper. Until that time I will use my blog. Much confusion much upset, much wish it never happened.i described a situation to my counsellor where I just wanted an answer from him. But as she said its never going to happen It was irrational behaviour so no rational explanation Just a sense of him needing much adulation to big himself up. As a 14 year old I guess I did this, as he was my white knight in a very dark black world.