Christmas post

Christmas is a funny time supposed to be joyous but for me it’s bittersweet.
I can think back to Christmas past and look back with happy memories but also some terrible memories. One thought that popped in my mind today was the school Christmas card post. At my last primary school they had a made up post box where we would all deposit our Christmas cards for friends. Then at the Christmas party they would be distributed to all the children. The anticipation for me was great I don’t know why. But I got very excited at the prospect of receiving cards. I got very few maybe 4 or 5. I watched as piles of cards were distributed and lots of friends had vast amounts given. It was then i realised I didn’t ever really fit in anywhere. It was upsetting and disappointing to realise how unpopular I must have been. With never ever knowing why! How can you be unlikeble at 11? But I was. And I guess my confidence started to nosedive at that age. When I joined secondary school I was very badly bullied. Which quite honestly out me off people totally. And here I am working in customer service wondering why I’m stressed all the time

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