Prince purple pain

Prince died.   A part of my life spent listening to what I thought were poignant lyrics also died. Lyrics I spent hours listening to reminding me of secret rendezvouz secret meetings of a secret love affair

 A love affair nobody knew about. A love affair so strong and only Prince could write the lyrics to support that time in my life . I would die 4 u ! I truly believed I would die for you . I don’t expect you even remember that I very nearly died for you . I bet I lie buried deep within your mind hidden and buried! Or in your mind you have justified how you had a relationship with me , how I pursued you , how I oozed sexuality blah blah. 

We spent hours listening to Purple Rain , in the back of your rover . You even started to like the album and loved nicki and grinding! But now that i am 46 it is bittersweet memories I am left with. I hear the songs being played on Mtv As the tributes are played and my mind is taken back to that time but now I can’t see the past in the same rose tinted glow. 

This wasn’t love , this was abuse! I was 14 you were 44 I truly believed it was my perfect love affair. But you knew the vulnerability in me, you helped me with my home life and I trusted you. 

I’m still not  ready to deal with this but I’m getting stronger.every conselling session brings me closer to being happier and realising that your behaviour was NOT my fault . 

So for me , thank you Prince for the beautiful music , and I will continue on my journey to turn my purple pain back to purple rain . See you in the new world x

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